I can so identify with Greta Garbo.
I woke up and carpooled in to work, was with either students or co-workers all day, and then carpooled home. I get home when my family gets home from school pickup and is starting homework-- not a peaceful time. We tried a "family walk" when I walked the dog; basically this means the adults walk in a circle around the playground while the kids play. Roar kept running off the playground to pet the dog, and on the way there and back she kept running ahead of us, dangerously close to the road. When she does that, she has to walk with someone holding her hand-- and when her hand is held she tends to drop to the ground and refuse to walk.
I tend to be a quiet person who enjoys being alone. When I am around people for too long, I get edgy. I become easily irritated, a little jumpy, and speak very little. I am not snapping at people, but it is taking a lot of self-control. Arrrgggh. Just having people talk to me is annoying me!
Inhale. Cleansing breath. "Serenity now. SERENITY NOW!!!" I'll be better tomorrow.
7 comments:
It's a good film, but how can Serenity help you?
I need alone time. And yet I also need company in which to be alone. It is odd but this week I have really missed people (the people I spend most of my time with have been away). Not that I ever talk to them... but they provide a backdrop to my thoughts. I enjoy reading books with other people nearby. I enjoy walking in silence.
So... I was wondering, can you not find solitude with other people around somehow? Perhaps have a place in your own mind to retreat to? I was given the idea of a(n inner) peace garden when I was 10 and that has never really left me.
I am currently hiding out in my 10th floor hotel room from a wild karaoke party. So I completely understand. Now, I do like these people and had they been off to a dance club instead, I would probably have gone with. But oddly, I find dancing more solitary... particularly as we go to gay discos and I, a middle aged straight woman am pretty safe there.. and the idea of karaoke is just waaaay too interactive for me.
There is a reason Rian locks Self in the bathroom every evening for an hour.
And also a reason Rian does not answer the telephone.
can you not find solitude with other people around somehow?
Yes and no. Most of the time I need to be accessible. Well, pretty much all of the time at work. Teachers kind of have to stay focused on the students, unfortunately. I can do that sometimes at home, but really only once the Littlest One is in bed; the rest of the Residents here can entertain themselves, but if the Littlest One is entertaining herself there is often paint, shaving cream, or a sinkful of soap suds involved.
bob, do you know that "Serenity Now" is a Seinfeld, not a Firefly, reference? Or are you messing with my pretty little head?
h, Have you ever tried to sing "I Will Survive" at karaoke, though?
Rian, is Calgon locked in the bathroom with you?
I wasn't messing with your head at all... thanks for telling me the reference.
Rian knew it because Rian's father - the World's Biggest Seinfeld Fan - shouts it often.
Ooochie mama!
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